Blind Date

After losing all my hair, my boyfriend shaved his head. I only hope that I can support someone like he did for me. We've since moved apart and I've been on 2 blind dates. My friends are so sweet to try to set me up, but it is hard to be Bald & Single. On a normal first date I spend a good amount of time figuring out what to wear. This is a usual female ritual. An extra anxiety always creeps into my head. To wig or not to wig.

The guy will inevitably learn that I'm bald and that I'm comfortable without a wig. However, will wearing the wig on the first couple of dates add to the comfort level of both? I know there is no definite answer and it depends on the situation, but I wanted to share my two experiences.

The first blind date I was so anxious during the entire evening that I could not even enjoy the company. A very selfish experience on my part. By the end of the evening, I had told him that I had Alopecia, was wearing a wig, and I did not know when or if the hair would grow back. I left him in a confused state. Lesson 1: Life is not all about me. Wearing a wig is not a form of dishonesty and does not have to be explained on the first date.

The second blind date I decided to wear the wig again, but to relax and enjoy the evening. After an enjoyable first date and several nice conversations, my brain began to race again. When do I tell him that I'm bald? It is such a distracting question. I finally told him on the third date. His response was silence followed by, "I think I knew someone in school with Alopecia." He engagingly listened to my explanation of the disease and I showed him my driver's license picture. License pictures are never flattering but it is the only pre-hairloss photo I always have with me. We saw each other a few more times and he decided to just be friends. Lesson 2: Don't be so anxious about the man's response, embrace the experience in meeting someone new, and look forward to someone falling in love with you for who you are.

I will not lie. The fear of not being given a chance because I'm bald does creep in. However, that is a selfish lie contrived in my head. I look forward to future dates and to discovering how others see beauty.